


Who's That Sitting In My Kitchen?

by Merixcil



Series: Tumblr Fics [69]
Category: 20th Century CE RPF, Big Bang (Band), Historical RPF
Genre: Conscription, Crack, Gen, ahistorical nonsense
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-01-31
Updated: 2017-01-31
Packaged: 2021-03-01 22:06:51
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,281
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23894293
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Merixcil/pseuds/Merixcil
Summary: Seunghyun meets Karl Marx while in the army
Relationships: Choi Seunghyun | T.O.P & Karl Marx
Series: Tumblr Fics [69]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1759627
Kudos: 1





	Who's That Sitting In My Kitchen?

Army life was hard. Not least because Seunghyun was expected to sleep on an uncomfortable little block of a bed that was almost indistinguishable from every other piece of furniture in the barracks. For the first few nights he had tried to convince himself that there was something admirable about the absolute uniformity of military design, but minimalism had only ever been fun for him when it drew focus to something uniquely odd. 

His bed the same as every other bed, the chairs in the dorms the same as those in the kitchens, even his clothes were identical in every way to those of every other soldier. Jiyong was going to have a rough time of it when he eventually called up, it gave Seunghyun a headache just thinking about it. 

He was trying not to think about Jiyong too much, or anyone on the outside. The army wasn’t supposed to be a prison but it functioned in more or less the same way. Visiting was prohibited, getting out was temporary at best, no phones. No instagram. If he’d just been able to take a few photos, Seunghyun was sure he could turn some aspect of this physically arduous, aesthetically dull landscape into into art. 

The CO woke them at five every morning, and they had to be dressed with a tidy bunk before they were allowed to go to breakfast. Meals were served in the mess, lines of soldiers jostling for space and overcooked rice. Sometimes, when Seunghyun concentrated very hard, he was able to convince himself that it had an aftertaste reminiscent of steak, or fine wine. Jesus Christ, he’d only just gotten here and he was already planning his first few days when he got out. The food, the people, the sweet sweet privacy. 

The only privacy afforded by the army was in the two hours downtime they were allowed in the evenings. Most of the guys in the barracks would use the time to play football or cards. Still working out how to bond with one another, forming friendships. Seunghyun supposed he’d have a better time of it if he did the same, but he was a loner by nature and the few times he had tried to make conversation people had been too flustered by his celebrity to talk straight. It was easier to grab a book, take himself off to the small room that passed as a dorm kitchen and drown his sorrows in green tea. 

Seunghyun took a sip and made a face. He hated green tea and missed soju, but alcohol was a luxury item that he was a long way off earning in the eyes of the South Korean Army. He tried not to think too hard about Francis, who was no doubt back home thinking very hard about him. The only person Seunghyun had ever been able to tolerate on a long term basis, his flatmate was more than a little partial to a drink of an evening and it seemed unlikely that he had decided to slow down with his landlord out of town. 

Maybe Seunghyun was being a little harsh. There were plenty of people who’s company he could tolerate on a long term basis, Bigbang would have imploded by now if he couldn’t, but everyone else had had to learn when to back off and leave him to his own devises. Francis was an artist and a blabber mouth and it could be hard to believe he had ever shut up in his life, but most impressive was the fact Seunghyun didn’t resent him for it. 

“All painting is an accident,” Francis would grin, having watched Seunghyun miss his step and splatter paint over something that had previously looked like it had purpose, “But it’s also not an accident. Because one must select what part of the accident one chooses to preserve.” Then he would cut very carefully around the splatter, and add another page to his wall of accidents created by Seunghyun. 

It was a far cry from having a Sergeant screaming in his face because he missed a leaf while raking in the yard, that’s for sure. 

Seunghyun shook his head, trying to clear out any stray thoughts of Francis. They’d see each other when he was next on shore-leave, it’s not like he had a girlfriend to go back to. 

One of the great advantages of hanging out in the dorm kitchen, was the lack of attention it garnered from anyone else in his troop. Beyond the odd soldier drifting in for a cup of tea, Seunghyun could be more or less sure that he would be left alone. 

Still, there’s a first time for everything. “Is the coast clear?” 

Seunghyun looked up to see a familiar bushy face staring down at him. Karl. Instantly recognisable by nature of his not being Korean and his ability to keep wriggling out of the CO’s line of sight before anyone could give him the mandatory shave that soldiers were supposed to receive before they moved into the barracks. He was Russian or Ukrainian or something, with bright black eyes and a mane of grey facial hair. Seunghyun hadn’t ever had much of a conversation with him, but Karl would sometimes catch his eye across the mess and wink as if the two of them were party to a secret. 

Blinking, Seunghyun looked round the room. No one else in sight. “I guess so.”

“Excellent. You don’t mind if I hide out here for a while, right? They’re after me with a set of clippers.”

On the one hand, Seunghyun definitely did mind if Karl stayed. On the other, his beard was one of the few breaths of fresh air going in the army, and Seunghyun was compelled to protect it. After a moment’s consideration, he nodded to the one empty chair in the room by way of acquiescence. 

“Many thanks,” Karl beamed, “I keep trying to explain that it would be a tragedy to lose this beard but they never listen. I suppose I could grow it back again but it’s the principal of the thing, you know?”

“If it grew back, they’d cut it off again. It wouldn’t be a tragedy anymore, it would just be a farce.” Seunghyun replied. He hadn’t meant to sound so morbid. The grey of the barracks was already bleeding into his bones. 

Karl did not seem remotely phased by Seunghyun’s dour temperament. His eyes sharpened and his back straightened, the way people always pull themselves together when they believe they’re in the company of someone who shares their values. “Right you are, young man. You know, if you were interested-”

“I’m not,” Seunghyun cut in before Karl could get too far with his proposition. It had to be a proposition. People like Karl didn’t survive in the army without a serious agenda, and they didn’t single out people like Seunghyun without intent. 

Karl sat back in his seat, smirking, “you mean you’re not even a little interested in overthrowing the military elite and allowing the common soldier an equal share in rank and file.”

Seunghyun frowned, “it doesn’t work like that. In that kind of system the title ‘common soldier’ wouldn’t mean anything.”

“Exactly”

“The military is, by it’s nature, a hierarchical order.” 

“And I’m telling you it doesn’t have to be.” The gleam in Karl’s eyes was insufferable and unwavering. It sparked something in Seunghyun, a curiosity of sorts, mixed with a feeble hope of friendship. Karl was not an easy person to talk to, but then again, neither was Francis. 

Shutting his book and setting down his rapidly cooling tea, Seunghyun turned to face Karl properly. “I’m listening.

**Author's Note:**

> why write silly crack fic when you can take nonsense prompts seriously?
> 
> This work was originally posted as part of a multi chaptered 'tumblr prompts' fic that I'm trying to split up. If you think you've read it before, you probably have


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